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My Life Before CR Was A Mess


 Editor    Feb 04 : 12:59
 None    Recovery Stories

My life before CR was a mess.

My life before CR was a mess. At the age of 11 or 12, I started drinking and using drugs. It started out with me just drinking. A couple of friends and I would stay out all night drinking. My mother used to get so upset with me. One day I decided to try some marijuana. Some friends and I got some marijuana and we smoked. At first I wasn't going to, but I was curious so I smoked with them. I said I would never use anything but marijuana.

I thought that the people on TV were telling me to kill myself...
One day when I was 13, a friend of mine and I were looking to buy some marijuana. We ran into this guy who had LSD and we got some from him. This ended up being my drug of choice.

After this my life became all messed up. By the age of 15, I was going out to clubs and raves, which are underground parties, and using all types of drugs like PCP, Ecstasy, Cocaine, Special K and Mushrooms. I ended up having a bad LSD trip and flipping out at my house. What happened was this, I came home with some of my friends after taking some LSD. A friend and I got into a fight and it ended up seeing him as a demon. I threw out my friends thinking that it would help, but it didn't. I was hallucinating too hard. I thought that the people on TV were telling me to kill myself because that was the only way to save myself. My mother came home and saw the way I was. She tried to talk to me, but I thought that she was some type of demon too. I ended up throwing her across the room. Finally, the police came in. I woke up in the hospital. They made me stay in a psychiatric hospital for a month. After getting out, I went into aftercare at an afternoon rehab facility. About two weeks later, I went back to using. My story went on like this for about another two years during which I ended up in the hospital again after another bad trip.

I went back to school and got my GED. I then started attending college while still doing drugs. At school I met this guy who invited me to study the bible, so I did. We talked about each other's lives. When he heard about my life, he told me about this group called CR from his church and asked me if I wanted to go. I said, "Why not?"

After I saw how serious CR was I didn't want to go back. They asked me to write a journal, which consisted of what I used from the first time to the last, what happened and how I felt. After writing it they asked me to read it in front of everyone in CR. After reading it they gave me feed back and told me about their own stories. After awhile I started giving feedback too. When I found out that I was graduating, I was so excited.

I am so grateful for CR. I am grateful that God has given me a second chance. I look forward to bringing someone to CR so they can have a second chance at living a sober life too.

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