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My Heart Was Rock Hard

 Editor    Feb 04 : 13:06
 None    Recovery Stories

I've been a disciple now for almost nine years.

I've been a disciple now for almost nine years. I was baptized into the Dallas / Ft. Worth teen ministry at the age of 17. Prior to studying the Bible I smoked half a pack of cigarettes per day for three years. Thankfully, I was able to quit when I saw that smoking wasn't something that Jesus would do. Little did I know that my abstaining from cigarettes wasn't the same as recovery. When I was nineteen I gave into temptation and smoked half of a cigarette. What possible damage could half a cigarette do?

I started on the road to recovery one small step at a time.
That was just the beginning. I was going to an acting conservatory in late '96 and the first semester was a pretty successful time, spiritually speaking. Soon though, I was caught up into the party scene which in turn, led me back to smoking again. I started drinking which led to more sin and alcohol became the center of my world. I loved everything about it. The taste, the smell, the high, everything! I believe I was addicted from the first beer I ever had. From that point on I was in a downward spiral. Spiritually, I was doing horribly. Sure, I was still going to church, but my heart was rock hard and my best friends were no longer in the Kingdom but were instead the ones I was partying with. I really did want to stop, but I would get more and more discouraged when I kept going back.

Through all this one thing is now clear to me. God was always there for me. He put a sister in my life who was a CR graduate from New York who offered to take me to group. I started on the road to recovery one small step at a time. I put my heart into working the CR group and after seven months, I graduated! I have now been clean and sober for three years! I'm so greatful for this ministry! As if this were not enough, God showed the extent of His love for me by allowing four people from the conservatory, I was a part of, to become disciples! Three are still faithful and one is married to a brother who has graduated and now leads in the CR ministry himself.

To God be the glory!


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